you're the crocodile on my back

-WEBCAMWHORE I AM, YES I AM.-

I want to tell you that the way you live isn't going in any direction. I want to say that if all I felt was real and everything felt like you had assented. That was what people search for, then this was bigger than it ever could have been. But if all shows to be a big lie, and things are not as they occur. That would break my heart into a thousand pieces, then there is no canvas or paint that can save me, no indulgence of art will keep me on my feet.

I was convinced of your sincerity. But at the end of the day you've cheated the girl in your life and devoured the girl on the side, left her broken. Not that it touches you, I think the farther I remove myself from you, the better to your advantage. How fortunate you are that your lies won't spill on your life, although you deserve no better. But I let time prove itselve. For who hurts on purpose gets it back right between the eyes. I think I love you, I think I honestly care about you. I will not give up, but my love will be buried in my heart.

The last month, all I got was lies and deceit, I deserve much more than I get. But I see what I see, and I want what I want and I want my crocodile. I will catch it and then release it in the back of my head. I shall cherish and love it for as long as I breathe and think of him.

I can't say goodbye, not yet. Time heals all wounds they say but this wound is so deep. I don't know where to begin. Devour my heart, and ruin my life. I will always be grateful.