SHIT

So hello,

Haven't been here for some time ( wellll in my eyes), I just haven't been able to get the right words to flow from my fingers. Slowly but surely I'm standing up, this time on my own.

The amount of pain I had and still have to swallow compensates the endless pills I pop, my eyes are tired and my energy is gone. He has released something in me, somehow I seem tougher.

Intentionally, I spat on most people around me, I deliberately removed them from my life.

I have stripped myself of everything that made me suffer, no tears and no regrets. So teh attitude of the week, if he chooses not to be part of my world thats his mistake, I'll be all that he will never have.

I waited anxiously, like a stupid girl wobbling on her chair I waited. I do regret all the time I've wasted on you ..

I regret knowing you, 'cause after all .. you are nothing BUT A FUCKING LIAR, WITH A STRAIGHT FACE YOU TOLD ME HOW MUCH YOU LIKED ME, YOU SAID I'LL SPEAK TO YOU EVERYDAY BLABLABBLAAA ... YOU ARE SUCK A FUCKING LIAAAAAR, YOU AS DUMB AS YOU'RE DICK, YOU ARE NOTHING TO ME ANYMORE, I FUCKING HATE YOU SO MUCH FOR MESSING ME UP LIKE THIS, I HATE YOU FOR MAKING ME FEEL LIKE AN UGLY STUPID DUMBASS SLUT, I HATE YOU FOR TREATING ME THE WAY YOU DID, IF I FUCKING COULD IF I JUST COULD I WOULD FUCKING STRANGLE YOU, I HATE WHAT YOU DID TO ME, YOU BROKE THE LAST PIECE OF ME THAT BELIEVED IN LOVE, YOU BROKE IT, 'CAUSE OF YOU MY BED SMELLS LIKE DEATH.

WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME, JUST BECAUSE YOU ACTED LIKE AND ASSHOLE AND I CALLED YOU ONE.

FUCKING COWARD ....

So okay this wasn't what I planned to write down but it happend .... I don't know what to write or how to write it anymore.

Sorry.

Grrrnjbsjflkjshlfhlhfoerhhgrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr