all out of blah

I can only spit from my own mouth, from my empty rotten body. That quietly is coming back among the living. Every day I feel myself gradually rise again. Together with the enormous pain, to be left behind. Afraid to be just another transparent blonde with tits grabbed by many, beloved by nobody. I am incredibly empty, I'm all out of blah.

You've hurt me more than I ever imagined, I am absorbed by a huge beast. Treacherous, ugly, lying beast, the gods of love above had to be drunk , when they created the crocodile. How can a young girl like me, be so broken is it possible at a young age to lose faith in true love? My life is at stake here, my faith in love is crumbling. I'm so fucking scared, scared of living this life. Repeatedly stabbed every time I got back up. But there's only so much that little girls can handle. I'll mess some of my books that is what I do best, swim in the pages of my beloved logs. I want to cry but I've lost all my tears, the only thing I am capable of is bleeding.

-sleep is the enemy, thank god there is tea.-